Everything You Want To Know About Lube

Lube makes everything better. It makes long sex longer and it helps reduce friction, which in turn reduces micro-tears in the vagina and can add more pleasure. I tend to be of the mind that there's no single best lube for sex so much as there's one that works best for you. After you make sure a given product is free of potentially harmful ingredients like  glycol, glycerin and fragrances, selecting a lube comes down to a matter of preference, and what type of sex you’re looking to enjoy. Because what might work for one orifice will not work seamlessly for another. Keep in mind the skin of the vulva and vagina is one of the most sensitive parts of the body and the last thing we want is to cause irritation. Gone are the days when all we had for personal lubricant was KY Jelly and now with so many options on the market consider this your complete guide to Lube, from what lube is best for different types of sex, lube and sensitive skin, lube recommendations and more…

What is Lube?

Many of us experience dryness and not all bodies produce enough natural lubricant for pain-free penetration or pleasurable sex. Throughout our lifetime the natural lubrication of our vagina changes. Medications, hormonal changes, lifestyle choices, diet and mental wellbeing are only a few potential causes. There’s no shame in needing or wanting to use lube. Lube is supposed to add moisture, prevent friction that may cause mirco tears or pain during/after sex, and add to our experience of pleasure during sexual activity. Not just great for penetrative sex but can be a great way to add sensation to experiences like oral sex or solo masturbation.

Lube and Sensitive Skin

The skin of the vagina and vulva is the most sensitive skin on the body—whatever you put down there is going to absorb faster than other body parts. Lube is supposed to add moisture, but if you're using the wrong kind of lube you are more than likely going to know very fast. The last thing we want is to find ourselves with a UTI after pleasure.

So here’s what you need to know, the wrong lubrication or one that does not work with your body will cause irritation or inflammation which will result in a change in your body's pH, resulting in issues like yeast infections or BV. Some signs to look out for would be tingling sensations, redness, or itchiness. If this occurs as a result of using lube, discontinue use immediately, there are better options for you, it’s just a matter of find out which one that is.

Ingredients to avoid

• Glycerin is the most common culprit for irritation, but it's not the only one. Petroleum jelly, microbicide nonoxynol-9 (a spermicide), and propylene glycol can cause issues, too. These are known for trapping and leading to bacterial overgrowth, causing irritation, and sometimes even contact dermatitis.

• Taking caution with anything containing fragrances or flavors, as well as anything that claims to be cooling or warming

 Recommendations

• The best products you can use would be find a natural single based ingredient lube. Coconut oil is a perfect example of this, with it’s antibacterial properties it can often support the PH level of your vagina. Just note, if you do use oil-based lubes, they can damage sex toys and cause condoms to weaken. But it makes a great solo sex companion.

  Want more options? Here’s some of my favourites…

Jenny xx

The best lube for penetrative sex

When it comes to vaginal sex, you want a lube with natural ingredients that won’t irritate your vulva so you end up with a UTI. Any of the lubes mentioned above would be great but things you want to keep in mind is how a lube might interaction with a condom. Oil based lubes can weaken the structure of certain condoms reducing their effectiveness. This is why I would recommend water based lubes. 

Choose Dame Aloe Lube or YES Water-Based Lube

The best lube for Oral sex

Who doesn’t want to play and try new things. Adding flavours, tastes, scents can take your oral experiences to a whole other level. You can do this cheaply and without much effort with the food you have in your kitchen or find some fun products to play with.

I have experimented with more flavoured lube than I care to think about but when I found the gourmet oil by Exsens I stopped looking!

This massage oil is edible, people! And it tastes AMAZING!

This warming gourmet massage gel is ideal for foreplay. When applied to intimate areas, the gentle warming sensation and kissable flavour encourages touching and oral pleasures.

• Gentle warming sensation
• Fresh flavors
• Sugar free
• Silky smooth, not sticky
• Nonstaining
• No bitter aftertaste
• Vegan
• Glow in the dark label

The best lube for anal sex

For anal play lube is a non-negotiable. The anus, unlike the vagina, is not self-lubricating. If you do not use lube during anal sex, you increase your chances of getting anal fissures, cuts or tears which can be extremely uncomfortable and painful and definitely something we want to avoid when it comes to our pleasure.

Remember, Lube Expires

Ok, we have ALL been there at some point in our lives. Bought something years ago and it has sat in a drawer for longer than we care to remember, but here’s what you need to remember. Lube expires.

Depending on what the formulation contains, there is a bit more nuance around expiration dates. In general, silicone-based lubricants usually have a slightly longer shelf life than water-based ones. There are also a couple ingredients that tend to expire more quickly—namely, Nonoxynol-9 and other kinds of spermicide, which you could find in lubricant (or as a coating on condoms)—and those would be less potent after that point.

What you'll typically see when lube does expire is a change in viscosity. What might have once been super slippery and wet may now look and feel thicker, which can happen from evaporation and dehydration of the product. Squirt a bit into your hand (ideally, before you’re in the heat of the moment), and investigate it. If you observe anything unusual in its consistency, color, smell, or tackiness...Replace it! This is about adding to your pleasure!